Happy Marriage Victory Week 4 🤎  Can you believe we’re approaching one whole *month* of this challenge?? It encourages me so much to think that committing to small, intentional habits these past few weeks will affect our marriages for the rest of our lives!!! Let that sink in. Your marriage is NEVER going to be the same- in the best way possible! I love the testimonies and messages I receive from wives telling me that they can already see lasting transformation in their marriage. And even if you haven’t yet, or just started the challenge, guess what?? It’s never too late. Keep going. Patience and faithfulness are both fruits of the Spirit and fruit takes time to grow. 

In honor of Valentine’s Day this week, we’ve got a rather spicy one… are ya ready?

Be sexually generous.

I know this one can seem kind of “out there” and/or make some women uncomfortable for various reasons so I just want to remind you- sex is God’s idea. Between a husband and wife, sex is holy. It is designed to connect you to your spouse in a way that you’ll never be able to connect to another human. Now I will throw a disclaimer out there and say that if there are medical reasons or you are freshly postpartum this doesn’t apply to you!! I’m talking to the women who have withheld out of spite or bitterness or simply just not making it a priority.

This doesn’t apply to you if:

• You are not married. Dating or engaged ladies, this week isn’t for you.
• Sex is painful for medical reasons (if it is, getting this corrected should be a top priority in your life).
• Freshly postpartum.
• Your husband is abusive (please remove yourself from harm’s way immediately).

This DOES apply to you if:

• You are married.
• You’re tired.
• You just don’t feel like it.
• You’re withholding sex because he didn’t put the trash out that week.

Let’s dive into what the Bible has to say- 

“For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” 
– 1 Corinthians 7:4-5

This Week’s Marriage Victory Challenge

So here’s the challenge- 

• Be sexually generous
• Initiate!!
• Wear lingerie or invest in something new
• Wear no underwear under your apron or clothing
• Do it in the morning
• Wear nothing to bed
• Make love in a new space in the house
• Do the thing he likes
• Give him a massage
• Touch/please him everyday this week 

Ladies, you know your husband better than anyone! And if this is an area where you don’t feel like you *know* him, make an effort this week to do that! Let him know that you want to dedicate this week to loving his physical body like you never have before! The goal with these challenges is to encourage conversation. Here’s a spicy one: 

“Babe, what’s something you wish I did more of in the bed? What makes you go crazy?”

Unless he’s asking you to sin, DO THE THING SISTER. Have you noticed that in scripture when it mentions couples conceiving it says that their husbands *knew them.* Isn’t that interesting?

“Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, saying, “I have gotten a man with the help of the Lord.” ‭‭
– Genesis‬ ‭4‬:‭1‬ 

You know what he likes, so do what he likes!! Do not hold back. Our love is to be unconditional. Physical and emotional. What does unconditional mean? Regardless of the conditions and behaviors that day. 

Sure, you may be tired. 

Tired sex is actually still very much so enjoyable and might I add *relaxing*. 

Sure, you had a long day. 

Maybe he did too and the thought of sexual enjoyment with his wife at the end of the day is what kept him going. 

“Well our sex drives aren’t the same & we’re never turned on at the same time.” 

News flash: no couple has the same exact sex drive and are ever turned on at the same.exact.time. 

Instead of blaming a sex drive or lack of being turned on, ask yourself this question- 

“Am I willing to connect with my husband right now?” 

Because that’s what it is. A connection and beautiful unity. Allow your body to connect and allow yourself to get to where he is! He may already be turned on at 500F and your oven is just now getting pre-heated! That’s FINE. Allow yourself to get heated up with him. 

I think we can get so caught up in the day-to-day that we forget to step into our husband’s shoes and see things from his perspective. Men typically find connection with their wives through physical touch and intimacy. Let him love on you this week as you demonstrate your love for him!! I don’t think we realize how much the enemy seeks to attack marriages using sex. I always say this but it’s true: Satan tries so hard to get you to have sex before you’re married, but as soon as you’re married he tries everything to get you to not. I refuse to let the enemy win. He can’t have my family. He can’t have my marriage. And he sure as heck can’t have my sex life. If you feel shame or anything negative towards the idea of loving and sexually enjoying your husband, PLEASE be in prayer this week about that. Do not feel weird praying about something the Lord created for your enjoyment.

The LORD created sex.
The LORD created sex.
The LORD created sex.
The LORD created sex.
The LORD created sex. 

The LORD created sex. Not only that- but he intentionally made it feel good for both the man and woman. Read that again. You realize that God absolutely did NOT need to make it enjoyable. He easily could have made sex strictly for reproductive purposes where you high five and bam- get pregnant. But the truth is, he didn’t… He made sex a form of worship. He made sex beautiful. He made sex sacred. He made sex HOLY. 

If the enemy has distorted your view of sex in any way, I bind and rebuke that in Jesus’ name! May this week be a week where you experience sex as the Lord intended it.

A Prayer

Lord, thank you for my husband. Thank you for the sacred unity and covenant that we have together. Lord, I pray over my mind as I engage in a beautiful act of unity with my husband. I pray you transform the way I view this physical bond. Heal any wounds, heal my heart and any wickedness the enemy has tried to plant. Let my husband and I becoming one bring such joy, love, beauty and pleasure. Let me see sex as how YOU designed it. Let my standard and generosity be held at your standard. Amen. 

Now go out there and have sex with the only human you can have sex with! ENJOY your husband this week and let him ENJOY you!!

See ya next week ladies!! Be blessed 🤎